Friday, November 5, 2010

Sad News

I received news that my Uncle Don was in a car accident and died in a Hattiesburg MS hospital on November 2nd. The funeral is today.

He was 80 years old. A retired Navy Lt. Commander. Pictured here with his wife, my Aunt Claire, who is my dad's sister.

Growing up, I was very close to my dad's side of the family. Every holiday spent with my Mammaw, aunts and uncles and cousins. I remember before getting married, Sam and I went to visit my aunt and uncle in Mississippi. For breakfast, Uncle Don made eggs and bacon and grits with lots of butter and pepper. Sam ate the grits to be nice but he hated them. I guess grits is an acquired taste for some.

My Uncle Don and Uncle Bob were the ones who talked to me before I came to Kuwait, to make sure I knew what I was getting into. They liked Sam so gave their blessing on my decision.

Sadly, it's been some years since I've seen them. I called my uncle and spoke to him briefly summer before last. Time and distance changes many things. I've been away from the States for 16 years. My dad no longer speaks to me. And I don't have much contact now with anyone on his side of the family. Blood is not thicker than water it seems.

When I opened a photo album to find a picture of Uncle Don, I also found this little card that reads:

A Prayer of Gratitude for Being Alive

Dear God,
Thank you for bringing so much joy into my life,
I feel so grateful to be alive.
Thank you for helping me appreciate all the small pleasures.
Please continue to grant me cheerfulness each day
for the positive things to come.
Please help me to continue finding the joyous blessings
you create with such generosity.
Amen

Friendship blessings, Tammy

42 comments:

Blessedmom's Simple Home said...

I'm so sorry for the loss of your Uncle Don. I'm sure it's times like this when the distance becomes a bit hard.
Blessings,
Marcia

Mona @ la la by mona said...

I am very sad to hear about your uncle. It is difficult to lose a family member, especially one you so fondly remember from your childhood. My prayers are with you, your family, and Aunt Claire.

And yes, I believe you have to grow up eating grits to love them the way we southerners do!

Hugs.

Draffin Bears said...

So sorry to hear about your Uncle Don's passing and sending my sincere condolences to you.
My love and prayers are with you.

Hugs
Carolyn

summersundays-jw said...

What a wonderful prayer. Wish I could live by it. So sorry about your uncle & sorry about your dad. Hope you can get things worked out. Jan

Southern Gal said...

I'm so sorry to hear of your loss. I hope the Lord will heal your relationship with your father and his family.

Treasures Evermore said...

I am so very sorry for your loss. I will be praying for you. Found your blog through Patti.

Sheila Rumney said...

I am so sorry to hear about your loss. It is never something that comes easy. May God give you comfort during this time.

Country Wings in Phoenix said...

Dear Tammy Sweetie...
Oh honey I am so sorry to hear about the car accident of your precious Uncle Don, but he has graduated to heaven.

Our memories are always filed in a book on the shelf. We but have to pull one down and relive it to bring them back to our heart. It sounds as though he gave you many sweet friend.

He flies with the angels now, and will watch over you so far from your family. Home is where you heart is sweet friend. You are home in Kuwait.

Many hugs to you and your Aunt Claire. God Bless you, comfort you, and surround you with angels to wipe your tears. Love to you sweetie, Sherry

Serena said...

Tammy, I'm so sorry to hear of this sad news. My sincere condolences to you and your family. Uncle Don certainly sounded like a wonderful and well-respected man who will be greatly missed by all who knew him.

Sorry to hear you no longer speak to your Dad. I kinda know about family rifts being that I no longer have contact with my sisters. Sometimes, it's for the best but still, it seems senseless at times.

Take care and thanks for posting the Prayer of Gratitude....very nice.

Love, light and peace,
Serena xo

sonya said...

Tammy,
I'm so sorry to hear of your Uncle Don passing. I'm especially sad to hear of your estrangement from your Dad's side of the family. I will pray for you and your family too. And it is hard to do, but we do have to focus on our many blessings. The love and memories that God allows us to have.
Praying that God will hold you in His arms.
Blessings,
sonya

The English Romantic said...

Hi Tammy,
I was so sad to hear about your Uncle, that is a tragic way to lose a life.
Thank you for the lovely comment you left for me. We'll keep well together!
I think friends are the best, my family sometimes hurt me very much.
My Dad doesn't speak to me either, at 86 he's fallen into the trap of young women who he thinks are more important than his family. My blog friends are the BEST!!

Roses, Lace and Brocante said...

Oh dear Tammy
It's such a sad time and the distance makes it so much harder for you.
My darling daughter is 12,000 miles away from me living in France and I understand how alone you can feel at such a time being separated from your family.
Take heart dear Tammy, that you have many friends here who are thinking of you and sending love and prayers across the miles for you at this time.
Take care
great big hugs from New Zealand
Shane x

Ann Nichols said...

I had just posted at Cindy's site when my eye was caught by your comment above... I am so sorry about your uncle. So very sorry. Just now I had to help my little cat onto the rocking chair... I say my cat but he's only been mine for 2 days now. Four weeks ago he was hit by a car. Bless his heart, no one who claimed him as their cat helped him for a week. Finally, he found his way to my door. He spent three weeks at the vet hospital but is now... on the road to recovery. He is without a tail but he is continent (something the vet thought he should never be again) and a very happy little guy in spite of being a cat without a tail and unable (at this point) to jump up onto a chair. I write all this because I guess because, unlike with your uncle, it is a tragedy with a car but has a happy ending. And I think... you need to hear happy endings right now.
many blessings and prayers...
Ann

Theresa said...

I'm so sorry for you losses Tammy, your Uncle Don and the loss you have felt from your dads side of the family. The prayer you found is exactly the one we all need to say to remind ourselves of what we have and what we can strive for... thank you for sharing it with us. I am saying a prayer for you and yours today so that you may be comforted. Theresa xoxo

Becky said...

Sorry to hear the news Tammy.All the best to his wife and you.Sometimes the memories we cherish become as real as it once was.hold on to the memeories of him and always your heart will feel good.Hugs, Becky

Heather said...

So sorry to hear of your loss. What a beautiful sentiment on the card and so true. Finding the little pleasures in life make life so much more enjoyable. Sending you heartfelt sympathy. Heather

Happy@Home said...

I'm so sorry to hear about the loss of your uncle, Tammy. He sounds like a very special man.
I felt sad to read that your Dad is no longer speaking to you. I hope that something positive will come out of this loss and perhaps his heart will soften.
My thoughts are with you.

Marilyn said...

My condolences Tammy.
That "prayer" you found, seems to fit you very well. You seem to be a very positive person, who always sees the good in everything.

"CREATIVE CARMELINA" said...

Tammy....here's me sending you another virtual hug!

It's raining here today..come by and hug me too woman!

ciao bella

creative carmelina

Phyllis said...

Dear Tammy,

I am so sorry for your loss.

I appreciate a small glimpse into the "other" side of you and can relate to family disputes.
You don't wallow in it though and set a positive example for others.

xo
Phyllis

DeeDee said...

So sad for your news...sending you gentle hugs and keeping my prayers with you...

on a wierd note for my my son-in-law is in Hattisburg,MS right now waiting to get deployed and he will pass thru Dubai, Kuwait on his journey...I feel a part of me is passing a part of you..

I will send a email soon...know you are in my heart.

DeeDee said...

Can you email me...I want to send you a message...pls

ddsdoubles at hot mail dot com....

Claus said...

I'm terribly sorry for your loss Tammy. While there is little contact with that side of your family these days, they were for you during important times. He is up in Heaven now, still looking down on you.
hugs your way.

Cindy Adkins said...

Hi Tammy,
I am so sorry to hear about your uncle--that is so incredibly sad...I can't even imagine how it felt to get such shocking news...I am so indeed sorry for your loss.

I can't even begin to imagine how your aunt is doing...I pray that she will be comforted by the support of family and friends, but this is so much to go through...I will pray for her and you and your whole family.

Sending hugs your way,
Love,
Cindy

Bettyann said...

Dear Tammy..so sorry to hear about your Uncle Don..it is doubley sad about your Dad..my prayers are with you and your family...take care..

~*~ saskia ~*~ said...

Oh to find this precious, wonderful poem when opening the book, your heart must have skipped a beat.
I'm sorry for your loss, dear Tammy. Will think of you when I let the candles this evening xxxx

~*~ saskia ~*~ said...

That should be 'lit the candles' xxxx

glor said...

Tammy, I am so sorry. No matter age, distance, whatever, its always a hard thing to hear. Know that my prayers and thoughts are with you. Your memories are beautiful and how kind and caring he was to have talked with you and to recognize the goodness and love in the man you would marry and give his blessings. Its those things that we always hold close to us, nothing we can buy can be such a treasure. I know that he will continue to give his blessings now from his eternal home. God bless you.

Brenda Kula said...

Tammy, I'm so very sorry. No, I suppose blood oftentimes is not thicker than water. I often think maybe I'm lucky I never met my father. That way he never had the chance to let me down.
Brenda

Diane said...

I'm so sorry to hear about your Uncle Don. Sometimes these things open up memories that you forgot (or were trying to forget). I'm glad he had a happy part in your life and left you with good memories. Please accept my sympathy. Hugs, Diane

Yarni Gras! said...

heartfelt condolences on the lose of your Uncle.

A Cottage Muse said...

So sorry for your loss Tammy ~ hugs to you. You are in my thoughts and prayers.

Gayle said...

I'm so sorry for your loss, Tammy. Your memories will keep him alive in your heart.

P. S. I'm Mississippi-born.

Kate said...

Dear Tammy
I am truly sorry for your loss and the suffering that you are enduring. You will be in my prayers as you share each memory and love for your uncle. Take care

xo
Kate

daylily (Queenmothermamaw) said...

Dear Tammy, thank you for trusting all of your blogger friends with the loses you are dealing with. I had a favorite uncle who drifted away from me and there was no way I could seem to make amends. The prayer you shared was beautiful. God is with you and your family there in Kuwait and with the rest of your family too. Blessings.
QMM

Julies knitting corner said...

I am sorry to hear your sad loss Tammy, I send warmest wishes to you and yours.
Keep those treasured memories in your thoughts.
best wishes Julie.C

Cape Cod Rambling Rose said...

So sorry to hear your sad news, Tammy. I'll definitely keep you and your family in my prayers, as we continue to pray for the recent death in our own family. Much love and many blessings to you! xo

Candace@craftysisters-nc said...

So sorry to hear about the loss of your uncle. I'm glad that you have great memories of time spent with him.

Anonymous said...

I am really very sorry to hear about your uncle. It was actually a nice story to hear that he shared his concerns with you about moving to the Middle East so many years ago. It makes it obvious to me that he cared about you and your welfare and wanted to be sure you would be happy. That is a good thing.
It is always sad to lose a loved family member, but the memories you have from your childhood will always make you smile, long after they are gone. I have such special memories of time spent with family as a child. I miss my grandparents who are no longer here, but my memories of them always make me smile. I am glad to know you have good memories to look back on.
My condolances to your aunt and the rest of your family!

Love you,
Renee

Lesa's Life said...

I am sorry to hear about the loss of your uncle. You are in my prayers.

Linda said...

Dear Tammy,
I'm just catching up on blog reading after being away for the weekend and I'm so very sorry for the loss of your dear Uncle. :(

My heartfelt prayers of sympathy are being offered.

Thank you for sharing that lovely poem as well - I'm going to print that for my Dad - today is his 85th Birthday and he's always been negative about birthdays. This is the perfect reminder for him on this special day.

Love & blessings always,
Linda ♥

Melissa said...

Sending hugs and prayers your way. Can't believe I haven't been on here and have missed out on alot. I feel like such a shmuck for not being there for you. It's always shocking when something so unexpected happens to those once close to us. I'm sure that even though you weren't in contact as much, that he carried the same thoughts and had you in his heart. The poem at the end was a very nice touch. Will give you a call later. Love ya!

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